Judy Garland’s Skincare Routine (2022 Version)
CW: Hollywood, Abortions, Dead Grandparents, Marijuana Use, Herschel Walker, Beef, Familial Drama, Murder, Substance Abuse, Orgasms.
Author’s note: While I am not sponsored by any of these products, I would love to be!
Judy Garland’s Skincare Routine (2022 Version)
If there’s one thing about me, it’s that I am a sucker for Halloween. It’s basically genetic, so I didn’t have much of a say in the matter. My paternal grandparents were notorious for their theme and costume parties, which they would throw faster than Herschel Walker can ask his girlfriend for an abortion! Dead grandparents and abortion in the third sentence, I have truly outdone myself on this one.
Not only that- my parents were set up and met at a Halloween party
My mom is the original bruh girl; she didn’t want to be set up, so she tried to curve my dad with this insane dragon costume that she could hide in.
My dad has always been that weird.
They recently celebrated their 30th wedding anniversary.
Needless to say, I’m a Halloween girl. I always feel my most powerful and my most authentic self in October. Something I love as much as I love Halloween are the traditions that come with it.. Being a sensitive taurus with a large helping of sentimentality,, there are several Halloween time traditions my family and I have. I trick-or- treated with my family and neighbors until I was a senior in high school.
My dad had a tractor pull that he would drive the neighborhood kids around since we didn’t have sidewalks or street lamps, and the houses were far apart from each other (I had empty lots on either side of my house growing up). We used to TP my aunt’s house every year and we “ghost” our neighbors, which is essentially just ding dong ditching them, but leaving a basket of goodies behind.
Recently I have added a new event to the schedule. Once a year, on a rare October night when I have the home to myself (minus the pets), I order a pizza (JETS, please feel free to sponsor!), eat a handful of legal adult gummies, and watch the Wizard of Oz. Call me basic, it’s fine, but the Wizard of Oz is one of my favorite movies. Once I watched it high, and it was an out of this world experience. When the audience sees everything in color for the first time, I started weeping hysterically because it was the most magnificent thing I’d ever seen.
I associate my mom with Glinda, a beautiful and pale woman with curly reddish hair and blue eyes who is all about glitter and funky shoes? You may as well be describing Nancy Roma. I see much of myself and the people around me in the other female characters as well.
One thing I’ve always loved is how relatable this movie is. The Wicked Witch absolutely had grounds for beef with Miss Dorothy Gale. If someone dropped a house on my sister, I would be committing a felony immediately. However, Miss Gulch did not have a reason to hate Dorothy, and that resonated quite deeply with me because I know a grown human woman who has had beef with me since the day I was born. Representation is so important in the media!
This last time I was having my weird little movie night, I could not get over how gorgeous Judy Garland was. How many white people are about Marilyn Monroe, that is Judy Garland for me. I know so much about her, that I feel like I know her, and have semi secretly obsessed over her as far back as I can remember.
One thing that stuck with me during that particular watch was how stunning Judy Garland is- not just as Dorothy in the movie, but just a gorgeous woman in Hollywood. In the age of retinol and elaborate skincare routines, I actually posted in my note apps “I would kill someone for Judy Garland’s skincare routine”
According to the tik tok, this is the correct order to apply your skincare products in the morning. I am not sponsored by any of the products, but would like to be!
Cleanser
Judy may have been one of the most well known actors on the planet, but at heart she is still a Midwestern girl. She would use the basic clean and clear formula. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
Toner
I honestly don’t understand what toner is/does, so I can’t comment here.
Serums
Judy is a girl on the go, so I doubt she would want to lug around a bunch of serums in tiny, breakable bottles. This pure hyaluronic acid lotion does the job and is easier to lug around.
Eye Cream
Judy would certainly use an eye cream with caffeine in it. As much as I love her movies, it is difficult for me to fully enjoy the experience, because it is difficult for me to separate the girl Judy from her roles, tainting the movie experience for me. I hope she is living her best life in the next life.
Moisturizer
I think Judy would use La Mer Moisturizing Cream; it’s boujie, but basic. Something about containers like this that give off that luxurious old Hollywood glamor vibe.
Face Oil
I don’t think Judy would use face oil at this point in her routine. When I think of Judy- I think of that matte put together look, not the dewy look that’s more in now. Either way, she’d always be stunning.
Sunscreen
Starting and ending an easy routine with good, old, reliable Neutrogena (after Liza explained the importance of sunscreen to her, of course)
Onto the products I think would grace Ms. Garland’s angelic face.
Primer
Judy’s skin is already so stunning- I think she would use this middle of the road, Milk primer to keep her face hydrated and camera ready. As a performer, you’re often wearing makeup for 14+ hours, and that can definitely wreak havoc on your skin if not cared for properly.
Foundation
I think Judy would wear the Estee Lauder foundation, because while still considered designer, it’s fairly affordable considering the brand. This stuff is super long lasting, which is perfect for triple threat performers.
Concealer
Again, designer, but semi-affordable.I chose this concealer because it is called “Backstage” and has a little paint brush that is both cute and practical for cover ups between takes.
Blush
Even though liquid blush is all the rage, I think Judy would stick with NYX ‘s Sweet Spring powder blush. A classic pink, yet versatile enough to create different looks.
Bronzer
Back in my dancing days, every girl had this in their caboodle, so the OG theater kid would have one as well.
Highlighter
“Charlotte Tilbury’s Peachgasm highlighter is a pretty solid dupe for the youthful glow Judy had as Dorothy Gale” is not a sentence I ever thought I would write, but it’s true.
Eyeliner
I think that Judy would be a fan of Halsey’s make up line, About Face. This classic smokey brown would look stunning on her, and its easy to apply, even for people who can’t do make up very well (ie: me)
Mascara
Black, waterproof, smudge proof, long lasting convenience store mascara for Ms. Garland, please!
Eyebrows
Imagine this ad campaign: From Judy Garland to Olivia Rodrigo, Glossier transcends generations. (@glossier, please hire me).
Yes, the boy brow gel is that good. I swear by it.
Lips
You cannot find a more perfect shade to grace Judy’s lips than Lady Gaga’s LE RIOT lipstick.
Setting Spray
This is the spray that the Disney Princess and Character actors use, so you know it’s good. Good enough for Judy Garland.
And of course, you can’t forget your hair!
I mean, you already knew what it was going to be.
Stay safe and spooky tonight!
